Harleston Players Resource page

Dick Barton

The Plan

Updated 25/02/24

Full Tune
Melody

Welcome to my little den Efil's creme de la creme My congratulations On a crime wave that's sublime. You hellish breed, You cheating few, I've devised something new A scheme that is a symphony of Infamy and crime. So then, comrades Listen calm and coldly To your leader's master plan And by christmas Efil will be terrorising Ev'ry english man. British people constantly Crave for a cup of tea Morning, noon and night time They are boiling up a brew . Whitehall fears morale would dip If their tea stocks were hit So each city's tea is hidden safely out of view. Marta Heartburn's Discovered the location of the london Tea supply And we're going to tamper with the tea And watch our victims getting high. Marta offers cannabis when A man plans a kiss Soon they're at her mercy And she has her wicked way. This is slunk, her strongest dope And it is this we hope To be adding to the nation's cuppa every day. We must kidnap the Only man who knows Where britain's other tea is stored. Then we'll add slunk Get the country stoned And steal ourselves a massive hoard. So we need a trial run And the plan has begun Tomorrow we will tamper with Some high socie-teas We'll be causing quite a stir Down in belgravia When i serve refreshments That will br1ng them to their knees.